How To: Appropriately Handle Work Stress

What is there to do when your workload is piling up and the requests keep coming in? Short of staying late and working extra hard to get it all done, how can you handle the stress level appropriately and graciously?

  1. Minimize the Distractions
    • Put your phone away. If you are someone who keeps your personal phone on your desk, hide it in a drawer or keep it in your bag to prevent yourself from getting distracted or checking that most recent text which becomes an in-depth conversation.
    • Stay away from your social media accounts while at work (at least your personal ones). Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Pinterest, etc. can all be like a blackhole for losing free/spare time. What starts as a quick notification check easily turn into mindless scrolling.
    • Keep office chatter to a minimum. While it is always wonderful to be friendly with your colleagues, sometimes it is necessary to say, “I would love to chat, but I have a lot to tackle today. I am sorry to cut our conversation short.” Just remember, this refers to personal/social conversations, not professional meetings or talks with your supervisor. However, if a meeting or conference call is getting off topic and taking too long, do not be afraid to steer the conversation back to business so you can wrap up the meeting.
  2. Manage Your Time
    • Stay organized. Keep a running “To Do” list to track what needs to get done or what needs to be assigned. This is especially helpful if you are working on more than one project at a time. Not to mention, checking something off the list is an incredibly refreshing feeling! Additionally, keep your work space clean. Working in a cluttered environment produces additional anxiety for a lot of people.
    • Prioritize. Evaluate your workload and decide what needs to get done when. Keep timelines in mind and be sure you are working on the matters that take precedence. Working between multiple projects is doable, but sometimes you need to focus all your attention in one direction.
    • Make a timeline or schedule for yourself. Break down your work into smaller, more manageable tasks and have checkpoints along the way. Think of it as setting mini goals for yourself to stay on task!
  3. Delegate and Advocate
    • Delegate roles and responsibilities. If you have a large scale project, event, etc. you are working on and know you need assistance, ask your coworkers. Organize a team meeting and delegate roles and responsibilities to others. Just remember, do not pass off your work to others – they are there to help, not do your job for you.
    • Advocate for yourself. If your boss is continuously passing things to you and your pile is growing to be larger than you can handle, ask to meet with your boss. Explain to him/her that the quality of your work is important to you and while you appreciate his/her faith in you for asking you to do so much at once, you do not want to spread yourself too thin and compromise the quality of your work. When you express this, ensure your boss the work will get done by discussing an achievable way forward.
  4. Remember to Breathe!
    • Literally breathe. Inhale through your nose for the count of 4, hold it for a moment, and exhale the negative energy out for the count of 4.
    • Every so often it is good to take a break from the computer. Get up from your chair and stretch (aka Deskercise!).
    • If you have a few minutes to spare, take a walk outside for a change of scenery and a breath of fresh air!
  5. Take Time for Yourself
    • Take Your Lunch Break.
    • Use Your Vacation Days. After a long, high intensity period in the office, it is good to reward yourself with some “rest and relaxation.” Planning trips (long or short) and having something to look forward to can be a big motivator to keep pushing through the busy times.

Stay positive, work hard, and be well, y’all!

AB

Being Polite While Using Your Cell Phone

As a result of the tech-age we currently live in, a lot has changed when it comes to social interactions; however, some things should not change. Being polite during social interactions and being respectful to those around you should always be at the forefront of your mind. Seeing as we use technology, especially our cell phones, in all aspects of our lives, I am breaking down cell phone etiquette into the 3 most prominent settings – Work, Social, and General Public usage.

  1.  At Work
    • Put your phone away when you are arriving and leaving work so you interact and say hello/goodbye to those in your office.
    • Silence your cell phone when you are in the office, especially if you work in an open space or cubicles with other people. Hearing your phone ring or alerts go off can be distracting to those around you.
    • Refrain from using your cell during meetings and other people’s presentations unless you are adding things to your calendar or referring to it in order to review current events. Even with that, be cautious – it may still look like you are texting or not paying attention to the presenter.
    • Take notes with a pen and paper, not on your phone. If you do not have good handwriting, cannot write quickly, or need the information recorded to send-out immediately, use a tablet or laptop to take notes, but be sure not to have any other windows open.
    • If you work in an open space or in cubicles, excuse yourself to take a personal call on your cell phone. It allows you to keep your privacy and also prevents you from distracting your co-workers.
    • If you have a work/company cell phone, use it only for work purposes and never for personal use.
  2. In Social Settings (On a Date, Out with Friends, Visiting Family)
    • Put your phone away and give the people you are with your undivided attention. After all, you are out to be socializing with them and not with other people via your phone or social media.
    • Silence your cell phone. If your phone is continuously ringing and you keep checking it, you will likely offend the people you are with by making it seem like you are too busy to be there.
    • If you are driving with other people in your car and using Bluetooth throughout the car, make sure whoever you are speaking to knows they are on speaker phone. Unless it is an important call, let the caller know you are driving with other people and will call them back.
  3. In Public
    • If you are taking a call in public, use your “inside voice.” No one around you wants to hear your conversation.
    • Do not be on your phone when you are at the check-out counter or while someone in a store is assisting you.
    • If take a call that begins to get emotional, find a private place to use your phone or stay in your car until the call is over and you have collected yourself. This is especially true if you are “getting heated” about something over the phone. It makes people around you feel uncomfortable and quite frankly, you will embarrass yourself.
  4. All the Time
    • Do not text and drive!
    • If you are awaiting an important call and you need to have your phone with you during a meeting, appointment, meal, etc., simply let the people around you/who you are with know. When the calls comes, excuse yourself and take the call in private.
    • If you accidentally text the wrong person, simply send a follow-up text to saying, “I’m sorry, that text was not meant for you. Please ignore it.” Then, be thoughtful and add something like, “But how have you been?” if it is a friend or relative.
    • Lock your phone so you do not accidentally call someone while your phone is in your purse, pocket, etc.

I hope these tips help you to be more “Tech-Proper!”

Cheers, y’all!

AB

Say Yes to the Dress: The Entourage

Fresh off the heels of engagement season, many of you are planning weddings and/or being asked to be in a bridal party. To say this is an exciting time is an understatement! One of the big events during this exciting time is the bride shopping for her wedding gown. If you are asked to join the bride on her adventure, you may be wondering what type of interactions and feedback the bride will want from those attending. Here are the tips and etiquette dos I have learned from personal experience:

  1. Allow the Bride to have the first say on a gown:
    • When you are looking at gowns in the showroom, ask the bride her opinion of a gown before handing it to the consultant or putting it in the bride’s room.
    • When the bride comes out to show you a gown, let the consultant get her in front of the mirror and allow the bride to see herself before making any comments. This will allow her to express her honest thoughts without being swayed by your immediate feedback.
  2. Remember your place:
    • Whether it is spoken or not, there is a “hierarchy” within the attendees. While this may vary due to individual relationships, my overall thoughts are:
      • Mom, sister(s), and grandmothers (or anyone who is like a mom) come first – This is an important bonding moment between a mom and a daughter and/or between sisters, allow them to have the most interaction.
      • Maid/Matron of Honor – You are who the bride will lean on most so start practicing your best dress “fluffing” skills and be ready to test out those Maid/Matron of Honor duties early!
      • Bridesmaids, extended family, and friends – Take somewhat of a backseat to allow the others listed above to have a moment with the bride and share their feedback before sharing your own.
  3. When it is your turn to speak up, keep the Bride as your focus!
    • Some brides want a lot of feedback, while others are more personal – allow this to dictate how and when you give your feedback.
    • Be thoughtful in the comments you give. While honesty is always the best policy, honest feedback given in a kind manner is the most appreciated.
    • Similarly, some brides want a lot of excitement around their appointment (think voting paddles) while others do not like to be the center of attention. Ensure whatever you do makes the bride feel comfortable! For example, if you have an understated bride, it may be best to leave the pom-poms, signs, and other accessories at home.
  4. Keep the other elements of the wedding in mind
    • Several factors come into play when picking the perfect gown.
      • Location of the wedding: A beach bride will likely be looking for a dress style different than a wedding taking place in a conservative place of worship.
      • Date of the wedding: Time of year plays a big factor in dress design and material.
      • Budget: Always be respectful of the bride’s budget.

Simply remember the end goal is to have a happy bride choose the dress SHE loves for HER big day! If you keep this and the bride in mind, you will be on the right path to ensuring she has the best bridal entourage in the studio!

Cheers, y’all!

AB

Image by Cait Kramer Photography

Splitting the Bill

After a wonderful meal with great company, there is no worse way to finish the dining experience than having confusion over the bill. No matter the circumstance, a business meal, a group of friends, or a celebration in honor of someone, this type of confusion can always make attendees feel uncomfortable. In order to avoid any awkward moments, here are my tips for splitting the bill:

  1. Splitting the bill can be a touchy subject – The following are important to keep in mind as you plan group meals.
    • People do not want to “get stuck” paying for the expensive meals, additional appetizers, or alcoholic beverages of others when they do not consume the same. Not everyone can afford the same thing and it is important to keep this mind when you decide how to pay the bill.
      • Food for Thought: When the bill is split evenly between people who did not actually order things costing the same amount, those who are charged more often deduct from the tip. This is not the right thing to do as is not fair to the servers, but it does happen in an attempt to save money.
    • If going out as couples, it is often easiest to split the total as an even amount per couple; however, keep the first bullet point in mind!
    • Ordering as a group? First make sure everyone is OK with “family style” dining then agree to evenly split the bill for the food. If everyone is not consuming alcohol or ordering separate drinks (versus sharing a bottle of wine), considering getting a separate check for the drinks so that is appropriately split.
    • Bringing cash (and a variety of bill amounts) when you know you will be splitting the bill is a good idea. You do not want to owe anyone money after the fact or be responsible for holding up paying.
      • For those who are comfortable with digital payment methods, consider using the apps like Venmo and PayPal.
  2. If you plan to split the bill – Always make the plan known ahead of time!
    • If you are the organizer for a group get together, but you are not the host, you should let attendees know ahead of time the bill will be split. After receiving the R.s.v.p. list, send a confirmation note to all attendees including “reminders” and stating the plan for the bill.
      • For example: “A request to split the total for brunch as individual bills has been made of the restaurant. Brunch will be divided by what you order, not split evenly among everyone, in order to be fair to all. Thank you for understanding!”
    • If you make a reservation for a larger number of people, call the restaurant and ask if separate checks for a large group is possible. Also, ask if gratuity is added for a group of your size. Some establishments are unable to do separate checks; therefore, it is important to let your attendees know in advance if paying in cash will be necessary.
      • For example: “Please bring cash for dinner or have Venmo setup. We have been told splitting the check between several credit cards is not possible; therefore, having cash/Venmo will make it easier for us to divide the cost ourselves.”
    • Always tell your server you wish to split the bill when he/she begins taking orders. This way, when you order, your server can enter your drinks and meals as separate checks.
      • It is very frustrating for servers to receive a joint bill back that says, “Put $25.51 on the red card, $34.22 on the blue card, etc..”
  3. Ultimately, who is responsible for the bill?
    • Typically, if your boss/manager is present and extended the invite then it is his/her responsibility to cover the bill.
    • Similarly, with client lunches/dinners or interviews that take place over a meal, the hosting business is responsible for the bill.
    • If you are hosting a meal out for friends, family, etc., the cost of the meal and gratuity is your responsibility. Think of it as hosting at your home – You do not ask guests to pay for their meal in your home when you host; therefore, you should not expect them to pay when you extend the invitation to join you out for a meal.
    • If you are out to celebrate a special occasion for someone (birthday, promotion, etc.), it is customary that his/her bill is covered by the other people at the table. As a guest, be prepared to split the honoree’s tab!
    • If you are asked to evenly split a bill for a group whose meals are clearly not equal in cost, speak up in a polite manner to the person who is overseeing bill. Simply saying, “Excuse me, everyone did not order equal amounts and I think it would be unfair to expect each other to make up for our portions. May we split the bill based on our meals?”
      • If this is the plan ahead of time, but you know you will not consume at the same level as the other guests, you may ask the server to split out only your portion. This allows everyone else to evenly split the bill and for you to pay the appropriate amount for yourself.

No matter your age or the setting, splitting the bill is typically an uncomfortable situation to navigate. I hope these tips help you find a solution easily and relieve you of some dining out anxiety in the future!

Cheers, y’all!

AB

Work-Life Balance: Having a Social Life on a Budget

After the holidays and along with new year resolutions, a common theme to focus on is financial wellness. As young professionals making our way in our careers and becoming established on our own, it is very common to go through periods when we struggle to keep a healthy work-life balance. Whether it is from a financial, time management, or relationship perspective, it can be easy to get lost in the world of “adulting.”

In no way do I mean to be a financial adviser (I definitely do not have a finance degree), but I do have experience with “having a social life on a budget.” So, I am sharing my tips on how to maintain your social life while on a budget!

  1. Always Plan Ahead!
    • If you know a celebration is coming up (someone’s birthday, the holidays, etc.), put a little money aside each pay period to save for gift giving.
    • Taking a trip soon or want to plan a trip? The same thing applies! Set your money aside early in the pay period so you can gradually save and treat yourself to the vacation you deserve!
      • Be smart about planning as well! Book your flights and accommodations early using trusted travel sites with true deals.
  2. Pay Your Bills On Time (or early, if possible!)
    • Not only will your credit score thank you, but so will your stress level! Keep a calendar with due dates of bills and/or put reminders on your phone for exactly which day of the month your bills are due. Also register for the bill reminders via email or text. This will ensure each of your bills is paid on time and serves as a helpful reminder to set money aside when you know a bill is coming.
    • Most companies now offer automatic payment online. While this is a great idea, it is still your responsibility to ensure the payment went through and there is enough money in your account to cover the payment.
      NOTE: If you set-up automatic payment, always check the amount withdrawn to ensure you are being charged the right amount.
  3. Cut Costs Where Possible
    • Have you been looking forward to a night out? An easy way to save your money for the weekend is to pack your lunch during the week rather than eating out. You can also make your own coffee in the morning rather than taking your normal coffee shop run on the way to work. It is truly amazing how quickly all those little expenses add up to quite a chunk of change!
    • Rather than driving somewhere and paying for gas and parking, see if public transportation is available or if you can set-up a carpool.
    • If you are really looking to save more, consider cutting out some luxuries to give yourself a bit more freedom in other places. For example: If you have cable that gives a million more channels than you ever use consider downgrading your cable package.
  4. Track Your Budget
    • Keep a record of your income and your spending. The best way to start changing your finances is to realize just how much you make versus how much you are actually spending. By keeping a log of how much you spend and what you spend your money on, you will be able to identify areas where you can save!
  5. Take Advantage of Free Activities and Deals at Local Places
    • Most cities have a plethora of free attractions, museums, and monuments which anyone can visit. You can even find exercise classes and outdoor activities if you are looking for a discounted way to workout.
    • Attend happy hours when drinks and food are discounted.
    • Sign up for the rewards cards at your local grocery store and pharmacy/drug store – it can really save you a lot!

If you are mindful of what you are spending and make an effort to save a bit each pay period, you will begin setting yourself up for financial success. While all these cost saving tips are helpful, make sure you find a good balance between cutting costs and treating yourself. It is OK to treat yourself once and a while, especially when you know you have saved for it – That is the whole point of the work-life balance!

Happy socializing, y’all!

AB

Time to Hit the Gym!

Happy New Year! With resolutions top of mind, it is the time of year when many people head to the gym to better their personal health. For this topic, I turned to one of my best friends, Meredith Reiber, a multi-faceted fitness and nutrition professional who manages a gym as well as owns Pure Movement and is also a Diet Doc Consultant. Together, we have put together our tips for being a courteous gym member and workout buddy!

  1. Greet the front desk staff when you sign-in for the day!
    • If you have a quick question or request, feel free to pop in to the main office, but if you have in-depth question about membership or training we suggest scheduling an appointment with a staff member.
  2. When using the locker room:
    • Be sure to leave room for others. Do not spread out all your personal belongings across the bench, counter top, etc.
    • When changing or heading to the showers, avoid being totally naked. Use a towel or at least stay in your underwear.
    • Place all your personal belongings in a locker, do not leave anything laying out, and use a lock to secure your personal items.
  3. Personal Appearance
    • Wear appropriate gym clothes.
      • While at the gym, it is tempting to show off how you great you look, but remember to still keep it classy. For the ladies, avoid booty shorts (NOTE: there is a difference between yoga shorts and booty shorts) and letting the girls hang out. A supportive sports bra is not only appropriate, but you will thank yourself later for investing in good undergarments!
      • Wear freshly washed clothes each gym visit! Stuffing your sweaty workout gear in your sweaty gym bag amplifies your hard work (AKA sweat) stench.  Do your clothes, and your gym buddies, a favor by not wearing them again until washed!
    • Use deodorant! Let’s be honest, we all sweat, but let’s try to keep the smells to a minimum.
    • The mirror in the class studio and weight-room is to check your form on exercises. Avoid checking yourself out and/or obsessively fixing your hair and makeup. Additionally, beware of adjusting your clothing in the mirrors. Gyms are covered with mirrors and you would be surprised at how many people can actually see what you are doing (i.e. picking at your underwear).
  4. Be conscious of a busy gym and/or if there is a wait for machines.
    • Do not be a “machine hog.” If someone is waiting to use the same machine as you, take turns alternating sets.
    • The gym can get pretty crowded, do not try to wedge yourself into a tiny space between people. Be sure you have enough room for your exercises, but also be aware of taking more room than you need. NOTE: This is especially true during fitness classes!
    • Leave your cell phone behind! The gym is not the place to be snapping selfies, checking emails and social media, or responding to text messages, especially when it is busy and people are waiting.
    • If you know an exercise class fills up fast, register ahead of time and arrive early to ensure your spot in the class.
    • Gym rats! Be courteous of new gym go-ers.  It may be frustrating to have to share the equipment you have been using all year but these newbies have to start somewhere, and who knows, they may end up becoming a regular, like you, by next year!
  5. Respect other people’s privacy.
    • Some people do not like to socialize while at the gym. If someone has headphones in or you can tell they are super serious about the workout, let him/her be and speak to him/her after the workout.
      • There is a misconception about Fitness Professionals being able to workout all day.  The hidden truth is that it is actually harder to workout once you start working at a gym! If you see a staff member working out, hold off on those class, billing, etc. questions until after you see them wrap up their workout and are back in their office.
    • Try to avoid staring at people or watching others workout. If you are interested in the workout someone is doing, ask him/her about it after he/she completes the workout.
    • With that being said, still be a friendly individual. Smile and/or say hello as you walk past people.
    • Keep your comments to yourself.
      • Unless you are a personal trainer or member of the gym staff, do not critique other people’s workout. Leave this to the professionals!
      • If someone is not “in shape,” DO NOT make any comments about him/her. They are there working hard to get in shape, encourage them!
  6. Control the noise.
    • Avoid dropping weights on the ground when you are done with your set. Not only is it distracting, it’s not good for the weights or the gym floor.
    • Keep your headphones to a level at which you can hear them and get pumped up, but not motivate the entire gym (not everyone enjoys the same music).
    • Limit the grunting, groaning, and other expressive noises. Your goal should not be to have everyone looking at you, take Kevin Hart’s advice.
  7. Clean up after yourself!
    • Wipe down the machines and mats you use when you are done. All gyms now have sanitary wipes ready for use!
    • Put back all the equipment you use (free weights, medicine balls, kettle bells, etc.) to where it belongs.
    • If you used a towel from the gym, be sure to place it in the hamper.

While going to the gym or a fitness class is great for most people, we know working out at home is also a popular practice. If you are looking for a way to increase your personal wellness, checkout Meredith’s Virtual Workout Subscription!

Virtual Workout

Happy workouts, y’all!

AB + Meredith

Celebrating Holiday Traditions

In the spirit of the holiday season and families and friends (both new and old) coming together, many of us will be sharing, or maybe starting, holiday traditions. From those we have been celebrating with our families for generations to those we have created on our own with friends, they bring us together and make many special memories. The link between traditions and etiquette may not be apparent, but I have a few important thoughts worth sharing:

  1. Participate in the cheesy stuff! You may think you have grown up too much to do the childish activities, but trust me you have not. The smile it will put on your parents’ or grandparents’ faces is well worth it! Plus, it is your job to teach the next generation!
  2. Include others in your traditions. If you have a significant other or friend spending the holidays with you, be sure they are included in the fun. Teach them about what your family does, how it came to be a tradition, and have them fully participate in the festivities.
  3. If you are not able to spend the holidays with your family, ask the people you will be with if you can share your tradition with them. Whether it is eating a certain dish, singing a certain song, or a certain activity you always do, most hosts will welcome your addition. Just be sure not to take over the occasion and be respectful of the traditions already in place.
  4. Be respectful of making changing to existing traditions. If you have an idea of how to “enhance” a current tradition, be sure to speak with those who started it or those who rank “most senior” in the family/group. Perhaps they go about the tradition a certain way for a reason you do not know or they feel strongly attached to the way it has always been done. It is important to speak to everyone involved before making a decision which will effect the entire family/group.

As I get ready to celebrate my traditional Italian Christmas Eve, I know I am blessed to have family, friends, and loved ones celebrate with me. Cherish these moments and enjoy them!

Merry Christmas, y’all!

Alexandra